Most days are really hard for me. I wake up tired and I go
to bed even more exhausted. Each day is a struggle just to get through.
Sometimes, I just can’t handle seeing another hungry child but that isn’t
something that I can choose to avoid. There are days when I don’t want to laugh
or smile because the pain I feel goes so deep. I’ve never been okay with how
things are in Uganda or the world really. Every day, I am surrounded by great
need and almost always there is nothing I can do about it. That simple fact is
what makes each day a little harder. I came to the end of myself a long time
ago and now the only thing that keeps me going is the strength of the Lord. I
know that this is exactly where I belong, so I won't leave. The truth is, it's because of all of the hard things and struggles that I know I am meant to be here. I don't plan to walk away when no one else can. ;
So, I forget about yesterday. I stop thinking
about tomorrow. Instead, I simply focus on what God has given me today. I hate what
I see but I find comfort in knowing that so does God and that He has had a plan
in place since the beginning. And while leaning on Him I somehow find a way to
open my heart again and reach out in love to those around me. Maybe I won’t be
able to do anything against poverty, hunger, disease, pain, death, loneliness,
or suffering, but I can walk alongside those who are already fighting these
things and maybe I can bring them a little hope. God didn’t call me to Africa
to change it, just to love people and humble myself to a place of
understanding. So, while it can be very hard to see and feel success in the
work I am doing, I know that I am serving my Lord each day and that is enough.
I want
to tell you a story; a true one. I want to give you a glimpse into my life here
and what I see and face each day. This is a story that isn’t finished yet, in
fact I only became a part in this story on Friday. It’s a story about one of
the families in the village, and a family that the Lord immediately laid on my
heart. It was our last day in Zirobwe and we had planned to do some evangelism.
To me evangelism simply means that you listen to people, that you open yourself
up and are honest with them, that you try to encourage them where they are at,
and try and meet any needs that they might have. This last part I feel is
really important, because unless you show someone’s Christ’s love and meet
their physical needs how can they understand His love and have their spiritual
needs filled. I also believe that God brings us to certain people for a reason
and He has given us everything we need to bless that person.
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| Fred and Sarah |
On Friday we
split into small groups and went out and tried to encourage people. We were eagerly welcomed at the first house
by a grandmother and her three grandchildren. She quickly ran inside her mud
house and laid out mats for us to sit on and thanked us for coming to her home.
She told us all she had to offer us was pineapple and asked us to sit while she
prepared it for us. I watched her run around the small house stepping over a
hen and its chicks while she searched for a knife to cut the fruit with, and I
remember hearing a small whisper telling me that I was at this women’s home for
a reason. Soon she began sharing her life with us and about all the struggles
that she was dealing with. This woman was the sole caretaker of her three
grandchildren and two of her sons who also lived there. She could barely walk
on her good days because of extreme pain and swelling in her knees, and on bad
days she couldn’t move. Her husband had died years ago and one of her sons had
run away leaving her with his three children. The only source of food or income
that she had was her garden, which was not ready to provide harvest for them
yet. So, the six of them were living off of her youngest (12yrs) son’s
earnings. He would spend the day helping dig ditches or working in someone’s
field to earn 1,000-2,000 shillings, an equivalent of about 50-70 cents. With
this money they were able to buy posho (a kind of flour mixed with water and
usually sugar) and water it down to feed all of them. Her eldest grandchild
Sarah was fighting malaria and had run out of medicine. In fact the first set
of medicine the grandmother had borrowed because she was unable to pay for it,
and wouldn’t be able to get more
until she had. None of her grandchildren (ages 7, 5, and 4) or her 12 year
old son Frank were in school. They didn’t have money for school fees, uniforms,
or books and pencils. Both their saucepan and jury-can (a large can you carry
water in) had broken. This family was literally living on nothing. I had the
chance to share a little of my testimony and how God had healed me and saved me
from blindness, and I prayed healing over her. Since this was a family that
knew the Lord, we were able to encourage them and just remind them that He is
our provider and strength.
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| Jajja, Me, Frank, Fred, Alowless, and Sarah |
I also promised her that I would
try and help because I knew that this was why the Lord had brought me to this
beautiful family. I told her that I would try and find sponsors for the four
children who needed to go to school. I already knew them from seeing them at
Sunday school and Sarah was already very close to my heart. I had known for a
while that I was meant to sponsor a child and had just been waiting for the
Lord to show me which one. I knew that 7 year old Sarah was the one I had been
waiting for. I knew that the Lord already had people who He wanted to sponsor,
Frank (12 years), Fred (5 years), and little Alowless (4 years). I also was
aware that God had blessed me the previous month with more than I needed to
cover my monthly costs. I had been waiting for Him to tell me what it was for,
and I immediately knew that it was for food and medicine for this family. See
God always knows exactly what is going on in our lives, but what we often
forget is that He wants to use us to bless others. He gives to us so that we
may give to others. I had a chance to be a part of blessing this family and I
was completely honored!
Yesterday, I went out and bought
food, medicine, a saucepan, a jury-can so that I would be able to bring them to
the village after church. Unfortunately, after getting sick last night I
wasn’t feeling up to the long drive and asked my friend Hannah to bring it to
them today. I was surprisingly alright with it. Of course, I wanted to be
there. But it really isn’t something that was ever about me. I am just so glad
that they were able to see that God provides for our needs.
Here are some pictures of the
family. If you would like to sponsor one of the children, please let me know!
As soon as we get these children on the sponsorship list I will give you more
information about it. Hopefully, in the next couple of days. But again, feel free to message me if you have any questions.
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| Alowless- 4 years old |
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| Sarah- 7 years old |
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| Fred- 5 years old |
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| Family portrait! |
So, thank you to all of you who are
supporting me, financially and through prayer, without you I wouldn’t be able
to serve and love those around me. You are all a part of what God is doing
here.
